That’s an existential question, eh? Who am I?
I’ll start at the foundation: I’m a mixed race individual. I was born to a Trinidadian father (of East Indian decent) and a New Zealander mother (white European – I think her ancestors came from Ireland). I think it’s safe to say I’m a bit of a mutt. I really want to do a DNA test to figure it all out, but I don’t want to give my DNA to a private company. Tinfoil Hat Alert. I identify most closely as West Indian, but I don’t really look like it and I don’t really sound like it. My family would tell me that I am it anyway. They’re the best.
I’m Canadian. Through and through. My family moved to Canada when I was 2 years old. Hence my lack of accent. I wish I sounded Trinidadian.
I’m, therefore, the child of immigrants. We were solidly lower middle class growing up. My parents held education in very high regard. As a result, I have more of an upper middle class life.
My mother was a fine artist. She died recently. I really miss her. I’m more like my dad. So is my sister. I think we lost that part of us when she left us. The bohemian, hippie, artist who dated, loved, married a very brown man in the 60s. The woman who wanted nothing but for us to be free spirited. She birthed a corporate lawyer and a consultant.
My father is a physicist. He had a massive stroke 20 years ago when we were on the cusp of having an adult relationship, and has had a series of strokes since. I mourn for that relationship, but I love my Dad, who’s still here, but a different person than the one I grew up with.
I have a sister. She’s my best friend. Oh, and she’s British. But she looks more West Indian than I do. She was also 13 when we left Trinidad so she can flip into the accent. Inherant source of jealousy. There’s definitely a blog post coming that will take a deep dive into travelling as a mixed race family with four different passports.
I’m cisgendered.
I’m straight.
I’m married. He’s definitely white. No mixedness there.
I’m a corporate lawyer. I think that the act of going to law school has helped me refine my superpower. I will talk about my superpower in a future post. Words matter. Finding the root of the disagreement and confronting it matters.
I’m married to a lawyer. We fight about EVERYTHING, but in the fun way that lawyers fight. I’m sure we’ll dive into that one too.
I’m in my 40s. A 90s baby. Music taste conforms.
I grew up in a small town in rural Canada.
I have no children, by choice, I don’t want them. I can love yours. Mostly.
I like spending money on frivolous things. I try not to. I’m not usually successful.
I love to cook. People always say follow your passion. I don’t want to work at cooking, I just want to create meals that those I love love to eat.
I have white privilege, even though I’m not white.
I have personally experienced racism, even though I look white(ish). White adjacent.
I just want to talk about it all.